Issue link: http://read.uberflip.com/i/301854
73 SEARCHING FOR PEACE Chapter Fourteen I looked for anything to give me some kind of peace, some an- swers, a little comfort and some healing. I read sympathy cards over and over, looked for books, searched for psychics and sought out the counsel of preachers! I had to leave my son in the ground in Tennessee and drive back to Louisiana. It was the toughest things I have done, leaving him there. I wanted to escape my deep sorrow and to be released from my constant misery. Even with people telling you that he is in your heart now not in the ground, I felt so heavy. I found myself gasp- ing like I was running out of air to breathe. For weeks to come, I found what little comfort I could find only while lying in my bed or through eating food. My youngest son was so sad, and I didn't want him to see me cry all the time, but how do you just turn it off? Carson lost his big brother and his hero. My daughter lost her little brother and her best friend. My husband, who loved Bryant like his own and had ever since Bryant was 8, grieved like nothing he had ever experienced before. And me? I was of no use to anyone anymore I know how it feels to have those oppressive negative feelings so deep and so heavy you know it's crushing you, when it is a bat-