Denver Catholic

19 DENVER CATHOLIC | MARCH 28-APRIL 3, 2015 M arriages are usually not ruined overnight. One or the other usually does not wake up one morning and say, "I am miserable in this marriage and I want a divorce." It occurs little by little over time. Little by little, we can begin to avoid certain topics of conversation (since the last time that topic came up, it led to a fi ght). Little by little, we dis- agree on how to handle disciplining the children. Little by little, we argue over fi nances, whether to change jobs, sex, household chores, the kids, love, respect; the list goes on. Little by little, our hearts become hardened and our minds start wandering to thoughts of, "I don't know why I married this person. I don't deserve to live like this. I wonder what life would be like if things were diŸ erent?" What we think most couples do not realize is that we all struggle with many of the same topics, maybe to varying degrees. We look at the other couples in the pews and think, "They are so happy; what is wrong with us?" Just because we are in full-time Mar- riage Missionaries work doesn't mean we have it all fi gured out and neither do most couples that we know. Our world tells us that we should have the perfect job, the perfect spouse, amazing chil- dren; and what happens is a little curve in the road comes upon us and it blows our perfect plan to pieces. Sharing our curves in the road with other couples who have been there; seeking their wisdom and guidance can help mini- mize the damage. Our origin as man, male and female, is from a communion of persons; the blessed Trinity, Father Son and Holy Spirit. As husband and wife we are made for communion and our destiny is the communion of saints where we will be in joyous communion with God for eternity. Consider looking around at your community and pray about having a group of couples come together on a regular basis, to share hospitality and the beauty of our faith. Sharing both struggles and joys, gaining confi dence with each other so as to build each other up as married couples, raising Godly children and grandchildren. Somehow God works through the struggles. When our younger four chil- dren were 10, 9, 7 and a newborn, it was quite the task getting ourselves and the other three up and ready for 8:30 a.m. Mass but especially the younger four. We always woke them in what we felt was plenty of time to go to the bathroom, get dressed, brush their teeth, fi x their hair, get shoes tied and loaded in the SUV. Five minutes before it was time to leave, Katie was missing a shoe, Julianna still had her PJs on and Joseph thought this would be the perfect time to work on his jump shot on the indoor plastic basketball hoop. Things escalated and the yelling started: "Hurry up, we are going to be late" or "Stop touching your brother," "Leave her alone!"; "Do that one more time." Somehow we made it to Mass with a couple of minutes to spare; fi led in the pew in the correct order (certain children can't sit by certain children, if you know what I mean); we took a deep breath, tried to appear as though all was wonderful, knelt down to pray, when the usher walked up to us, leaned over and said, "You guys look like the perfect family to bring up the gifts." "You have got to be kidding me" was the thought I had in my mind. But instead, we smiled and said, "Sure, we'd be glad to." Matt and Mindy Dalton can be reached at matt@marriagemissionaries.org, 303-578-8287 or at www.marriagemissionaries.org. Marriage Missionaries MATT & MINDY DALTON Not always as it appears Opening to the right Word I want to share an experience I had over the weekend. I read the article in the Denver Catholic titled "On Rocky Ground" (Feb. 14-20). The article relates to the passage of the story about a farmer sowing seeds (Mark 4: 1-9). I wanted to read the passage prior to moving on to the rest of the article. So, I grabbed my Bible. I'm a bit embar- rassed to say that I'm not as familiar with the order of the Bible as I probably should be. I have no idea, in this 2,000-plus page book, where the Gospel of Mark lands. I have six "markers" (prayer cards, an article, religious book marks, ribbon marker, etc.) in various points in my Bible. I have not referred my Bible in a few months. I randomly open the book, it opens to where one of my markers was situated, placed there many months before between Page 126 and 127… Mark 4: 1-9, the very passage I was looking for! On the front of the marker it reads "Pass It On," on the back are excerpts from Hebrews 12: Passing your faith on is the greatest gift of love. We must get rid of every- thing that slows us down Especially the sin that just won't let go We must be determined to run the race that is ahead of us We must keep our eyes on Jesus who leads us and makes our faith complete We must keep our mind on Jesus Then we won't get dis- couraged and give up. I've heard there are no coincidences, only God incidents. This experience with Mark 4 was a "sign" for me, as subtle as it was. It makes me realize we just need to recognize the many small miracles that happen day in and day out. We can't get discouraged and we can't give up! Thank you and guest columnist Autumn Jones for "setting the table" for my expe- rience. With this "sign" marked with the "Pass It On" card I felt compelled to share this event with you, my family and friends. BOB HELLRUNG Arvada The real deal Kudos to Gina Warner on her article titled "Get- ting real" (Feb. 21-27 Denver Catholic). I shared it with all the members of my family as well as other Catholic friends. It would be nice if an article such as this could be inserted in every church bulletin. CLEMENT R. HACKETHAL JR. Lakewood LETTERS PHOTO BY B-C-DESIGNS/DPC CORRECTIONS: A city in Syria was misspelled in a photo caption on the cover of the March 21-27 issue of Denver Catholic. Syrian Kurds battled ISIS to retain control of Kobani. Two Latin words were incorrectly spelled in the March 21-27 issue of Denver Catholic ("Why Latin?"). "Sanctus" means "holy" in Latin, and "Agnus Dei" means "Lamb of God."

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