Denver Catholic

23 DENVER CATHOLIC | APRIL 22-MAY 12, 2017 Basic tips for everyday evangelization T he focus of this article is on the things TO DO, but it's always helpful to have a reference point for what NOT to do. Here are some things I would say to avoid at all costs when it comes to evangeliza- tion: • Don't try to WIN • Don't be afraid to TELL • Don't be obnoxious • Don't be a moral enforcer • Don't be a fi re hose But what to do? How can we be a compelling witness in our day-to-day lives? Here are fi ve simple tips: BE A RESERVOIR You can't give what you don't have. The heart of evangelization is sharing a "relationship," the one YOU have with Jesus & the Trinity. Nurture that relationship, cherish it, grow it and deepen it into a reservoir. Learn more about the faith and what we believe – there are countless resources to help you with that. Your evangelization will simply become an overfl ow of that love and life you are living every day. BE CONTAGIOUS Faith is something we should nat- urally share with those around us. It needs to be as simple as talking about a good restaurant or movie we went to – we share that with our friends and acquaintances all the time. Why are we not more like this when it comes to faith? If faith were a "disease," who is the last person YOU infected with it? Sharing faith takes lots of practice and sometimes even fails. Don't be afraid to take risks and just share about some way God has moved in your life with those around you. BE AUTHENTIC Be real, be genuine, be natural. The best evangelization comes out of real lived experience and communicating to others the great love we have expe- rienced in our own lives from God. Focus on that real, lived experience in your conversations and draw your faith into the conversation when it is natural and not forced to do so. BE A GOOD LISTENER God gave us two ears, and one mouth – we should use them in pro- portion. Listen for the "question behind the question" and the deeper desire underneath, even the some- times angry emotions. Underneath all that is a real human heart that God wants to encounter and pour his love into. BE A GOOD FOLLOWER the Church tells us that the princi- pal agent of evangelization is the Holy Spirit (EN 75). Learn how to follow his lead, his subtle promptings in con- versations, and to be aware when he is setting up a divine appointment for you. I have found that he will help me with what the perfect things to say if I can be more docile to his leadership. Guest Column Associate Professor of Leadership & Discipleship at the Augustine Institute. JIM BECKMAN Don't be fooled: Feminism isn't really about choice O K, call me crazy. But am I the only one who remembers, in my formative years, hearing repeatedly from the feminists that feminism was about freeing us women to make our own choices about our own lives? If we wanted to pursue high powered careers, we should be free to do that. And if we wanted to stay home and raise babies . . . well, that was a valid choice as well. One got the impression that they didn't understand why any self-respecting woman would make such a choice. But they nevertheless gave some good lip service, sometimes through rather clenched jaws, to our right to choose it. Well, apparently not so much any- more. Everything I have been reading lately indicates that the facade is gone. Motherhood is out. Careers are in. That previous incarnation of fem- inism — the one where women get to make their own choices about their own lives — is now called "Choice Feminism." And it is so 1995. If you don't believe me, just Google it. I did. What I found was a whole lot of academic, Marxist-sounding ideology about class and the patriarchy and struggle and some "queer" stu" that I didn't quite understand. Basically it all boiled down to this: We women may think we are making our own choices. But we aren't, because our choices are all so infl uenced by the patriarchy and the oppressive conditions under which we are forced to exist. So, we should instead choose what they tell us to choose. At least that's what it all sounded like to me. I understand the criticism of "choice feminism" to a certain extent. Many writers spoke out against this idea that any choice a woman makes is somehow a feminist statement. The most common example I saw was that of the "liberated" stripper who cele- brates her stripper-ness as some kind of victory for feminism. Which doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. But, do you know what the second most common example was? The choice of a mother to stay at home with her kids. It seems to baº e them that any woman would make such a bizarre sac- rifi ce. It must be because of the patriar- chy. Or because child raising is still per- ceived by our sexist society as "women's work." Or because we are still tethered to a "1950's male breadwinner model." It doesn't seem to occur to them that it could be because women, having nurtured these tiny little crea- tures within their own bodies, may actually want to spend their time nur- turing and raising them. The piece de resistance was a widely circulated article in the Australian magazine RendezView, which actually proposes that mothers of school-aged children be forced, under penalty of law, to be "gainfully employed" outside the home. Says Sarrah Le Marquand, some- what awkwardly, "Only when the tire- some and completely unfounded claim that 'feminism is about choice' is dead and buried (it's not about choice, it's about equality) will we consign restric- tive gender stereotypes to history." So, I'm thinking that by "choice" she means "freedom of self-determina- tion"; by "equality", she means "women being just like men."; and by "restrictive gender stereotypes", she means "bio- logical and psychosexual di" erences that impact our lifestyle choices." But the women of the world clearly aren't voluntarily marching into her brave new world of gender uniformity. And so it is time to employ the long arm of the law. Says she, ". . . it's time for a serious rethink of this kid-glove approach to women of child-bearing and child-rearing age. Holding us less accountable when it comes to our employment responsibilities is not doing anyone any favours [sic]." (I have to confess I'm somewhat curious about what will happen to unemployment numbers in Austra- lia when every mother exercises her "employment responsibilities" and enters the workforce. But I digress.) And so, the mask is o" . Feminism was never about allowing women to choose what they want. It is about coercing women to choose what these feminists want them to choose. It is not not surprising that, in a recent poll, 85 percent of women responded that they support equality for women, yet only 15 percent said that they identify as a "feminist." The movement has moved away from the women it is supposed to represent. As for me, I don't want the State, or the Feminist Powers That Be, to issue a list of acceptable choices for women. Particularly when it comes to the often complicated question of whether a mother works or stays at home. I still subscribe to the apparently antiquated notion that decisions like these are best made by the couple in question. I know. Call me crazy . . . Guest Column Bonacci is a syndicated columnist based in Denver and the author of We're On a Mission from God and Real Love. MARY BETH BONACCI Faith is something we should naturally share with those around us." "

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