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GOLD AND BLACK ILLUSTRATED VOLUME 28, ISSUE 2 11 her to apologize to her husband for me, for all the things I did to irk him and upset him. But I am just thankful for the life he has given me and the opportunity he gave me." As the line of former players wishing to speak dwindled, in through the church doors came Stu Schweigert dressed in a "Boiler Up" T-shirt and looking like he had rushed to get to Buffalo. That's because he had in fact been rushed. But he had the best of excuses. The All-Big Ten defensive back made the trip after spending the night before witnessing the birth of his son, Alexander, back home in Michigan. Schweigert literally beached his rental on the church lawn, then raced in to the church hoping he didn't miss his chance to speak. Schweigert was lucky that the story sharing had lasted nearly two hours, as he made it just in time. '"It's not what you take from this world, it's what you leave behind," said Schweigert, repeating Tiller's quote to the Ross-Ade Stadium crowd following Tiller's last game at Purdue in 2008. "He left behind some special things. I had my son yesterday, and ever since I was 13, I wanted to have a son. I have two older daughters that I love very much, but I always wanted to have a son. The fact that my wife just had a baby and still let me go fly here, just shows you how much this guy means to me. I owe a lot to Joe Tiller. He is a very special man." Following the planned fellowship time, Arnette invited all of the Purdue contingent, including me, to their home just on the outskirts of Buffalo. There were more stories shared, and a few drinks to be had. It seemed strange to be at a party that Joe Tiller should have been there to host. There were signs of him everywhere, with jerseys from all of his bowl teams and other memorabilia that decorated Tiller's lower-level man cave. Before I left, Arnette wanted to make sure I could see the view of the mountains Tiller so loved, so I paid another visit to experience the sunrise. It was well worth the trip to see the place Tiller loved so much in all of its morning glory. The following day at the funeral, another picture-perfect day in Buffalo, we learned a bit more about Tiller. Father Pete Johnson spoke about Tiller's quiet fight with Fabry's disease. It had attacked his major organs and eventually did him in. But Tiller always kept his plight to himself and maybe one other person. He had known about this disease for 20 years, but chose to deal with it privately. Two of Tiller's favorite quarterbacks, Brees and Kyle Or- ton, had been able to visit Tiller shortly before he passed, but due to schedules couldn't attend the funeral. Yet, two former assistants, Brock Spack and Kevin Sumlin, were able to summon private jets to make it to the funeral mass from Illinois State and Texas A&M, respectively. Before the ceremony ended, Father Johnson reminded Arnette how much her husband had loved her. It had been obvious for the 20 years I had known them. Perhaps the greatest gift that Tiller gave all of us was something he said to everyone he talked to as his life be- gan to dwindle. It too resonated among the Purdue football family. "He told me he loved me," Ayodele said. "And that meant a lot. I never had a grown man tell me he loved me. It really struck a chord, and I told him I loved him back." Even for me, those words happened. In late June, I called the house wanting to offer support to Arnette, with the hopes I could do something for the coach. I assumed that Tiller wouldn't want to, or have the strength to, speak with me. But he did, saying the three words that I never thought I would hear from him, words I didn't deserve to hear from him. But they came anyway. Yes, the football legacy of Tiller will forever be how he took a contrarian view toward the game and turned it into a big winner at Purdue. He has set the table for coaches like Jeff Brohm to have success, because Tiller proved that sustained success in football is possible at Purdue. That's all well and good. But learning more about Tiller's story and life and ex- periencing his life celebration left its mark on me, as I am certain it did many others. It gave me a road map for how to live the rest of my life. It was a road map for how to be a good husband in my later years, how to be a good father. How to be a decent man. For that, I am so glad I made it to Buffalo. j