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Marriage does not promise happiness as the world defines it. Marriage may include suffering and great difficulties. Marriage does not make us immune to the hardships of life, but it does provide a partner who will accompany and help bear the burdens of life. Thus, both spouses must practice daily the gift of self to the other. If I enter into marriage seeking my own happi- ness, I will likely be frustrated. But if I enter into marriage seeking the happiness of my spouse, willing to lay down my life, my interests and my desires in service of my spouse, I will find what my heart desires. In this regard, Christ is the perfect example of a spouse. Jesus poured out his life for his bride, the Church, even to the point of death on a cross. Am I able and willing to selflessly lay down my life for my spouse, just as Jesus demonstrated? The discipline of the Church states that Catholics should marry Catholics. A common religious commitment by both spouses is a sure way to find the necessary grace to persevere in the commitment of marriage. By keeping Christ as the foundation of married life, the spouses are equipped to endure whatever life may throw at them. Even if your spouse is not Catholic, it's important to share a common faith in Christ, which is why Catholics can be allowed to marry a baptized non-Catholic. Jesus can be the foundation of marriage, even if both parties are not Catholic. It becomes more dif- ficult, but not impossible, to foster a life-long marriage between a believer and a non-believer. With a dispensation, a Catholic can be allowed to marry a non-baptized person. If a Catholic marries a non-baptized person, it is important for the baptized spouse to keep Christ central to the relationship. Through prayers and a good example, the baptized spouse may lead the other to experience the love of Christ, and per- haps serve as the catalyst for their conversion. The discernment of marriage requires the evaluation and consideration of all these aspects. It also requires that the couple has freedom from external and internal pressures and influences. The choice to enter into the sacrament of marriage belongs uniquely to the individuals involved, not to family, friends, nor society. Thus, the parties must be free from the undue influences of others. Choosing the right spouse to marry is not a decision to make lightly, but as long as the couple seeks God's will and strives to grow in holiness together, God's desire for them will become more and more clear. Above all, keep prayer at the core of your rela- tionship, and you can't go wrong! 22 FEB-MAR 2024 | DENVER CATHOLIC